Start Fresh

Often, if you want to start a new chapter of your life, you need to leave some things behind.

For example, when you want this new and better job, you have to leave your actual job.

The same rule, I believe, should apply to our dating life.

But it’s easier said than done.

I personally have wasted so many years wanting the wrong men for me.  And that’s the key: the wrong men for me. It means there are people out there more suited for me, and what I want in life.

I was talking with a friend who told me she had stopped seeing this guy who was incredibly charming but not into something serious. She stopped seeing him but she could not get him out of her head. He was handsome, and funny and adventurous…but he didn’t treat her very well. She kept thinking about him even when she was dating other people. And of course that affected her chances of even starting something new.

So I asked her: Can you tell me what are your relationship goals? What kind of relationship do you want? And I mean, not just today, but years from now: What do you want your life to be?

She said she wanted a monogamous, long term relationship. Buying a house together. And she said she wanted kids in a couple of years.

So the next things I asked her is: Was the last guy able to give that to you?

Think about it for a second…Would he be around if you needed help with house work? And what about when you will be 8 months pregnant, will he take care of you?

You don’t want him in your life. That is simply not what you really want.

Keep that in mind, and you will be free to meet someone who will be ready to make you happy.

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